IM Bitchin – What’s Happenin in IM

Similar stories. Julian Assange is the face of Wikileaks who is getting kicked all over the place for daring to bring “secrets” into the light. Salty Droid in the same boat, but for exposing a different bunch of secrets.

This sounds familiar

For Assange, by contrast, a conspiracy is something fairly banal, simply any network of associates who act in concert by hiding their concerted association from outsiders, an authority that proceeds by preventing its activities from being visible enough to provoke counter-reaction. It might be something as dramatic as a loose coalition of conspirators working to start a war with Iraq/n, or it might simply be the banal, everyday deceptions and conspiracies of normal diplomatic procedure

I am a major The Wire fan and appreciated this being mentioned in the same article

Which all reads a lot like this

The Syndicate keeps prices high :: and dissent low. The Syndicate all but eliminates marketplace competition. Individuals or businesses inside of Internet Marketing who act against the interests of The Syndicate risk their financial futures. The Syndicate uses tough :: tasteless :: and intimidating tactics to defend against what it sees as threats to its unrightful domain. Many know about The Syndicate but are afraid to speak for fear of reprisals. Most do not know … but are never the less deeply affected by the cultural tone set by the group.

Both Julian and Jason have their own issues – as we all do – but it’s my firm belief that (using to faux-scientific analogy) for every action there is an equal and OPPOSITE reaction. Try to hide stuff and people will try just as hard to dig it up.*

*Yes I can see the irony of an anonymous blog talking about hiding things

And now back to the lulz.

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I lost my website so now I can’t …do business.

yo yo! you checking out that top piece of video marketing expertise, Maria Andros

decided to check out this website of hers she was talking about.

videomarketingqueen.com

OOPS!

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I’m seriously torn here. Y’see there has been a major launch of a product this week that is almost (if it hasn’t already) closed it’s doors. The usual story, tell the story of how it’s too good to be true, offer your money back guarantee, build up all that need and desire and then hit em with a $497 price tag. Sells like hot cakes I bet.

Thing is, you can go to the site help page, get a link directly from there to an email register page, (put in any old bullshit gmail account you care, oh proxy yourself up the wazoo I guess if you are totally paranoid) and go straight to the download page for the entire $497 course.

C’mon internet marketers, get your shit together and at least have someone with half a brain putting your honey pots together. Pay a college kid or something, but stop GIVING YOUR SHIT AWAY because I won’t pay for anything that is that easy to just take. You disrespect me as an internet user and your customer by not even bothering to have a login and password to get your stuff.

Because I am a nice person I won’t link the link here. If you bought **** Blueprint this week…. well you could have had it for nix. Probably still can.

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Internet Marketing This Week pocast is a mostly weekly podcast that covers what interests Ed Dale, Paul Colligan, Michelle McPhearson and Lynn Terry that week.  It is an interesting listen just to get to understand their personalities a little more, though a little light on”in depth” type information about internet marketing. Infotainment really.

The latest podcast (#12) has an enormous serving of irony with the chatty pie.

The majority of  the podcast covers people complaining about the content of the double-opted-in emails they receive when a large launch is underway.  Ed Dale is correct in saying “unsubscribe” to anyone that goes the greed road and floods you with that kind of crap (mind you that will mean MOST of the marketers, even the very best ones you subscribe to will fall to your sword- and GOOD I say).

The biggest peeve was signing up for one thing and getting another. Not letting those marketers push stuff at you that you didn’t agree to in the first place. Which is why it was refreshing when IMTW  launched to be told that the podcast will be pitch and plug free of the presenters businesses. Great stuff – integrity!  Information without sales. A glass of cool water in this burning landscape.

And then Ed Dale plugs Michelle MacPhearson’s latest launch.

Just a mention – but he did.

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Brad Fallon’s Twittering is erratic to say the least. 7261 followers (he’s a guru, don’t ya know) but only 262 updates since April 2007 (yep, 21 months – approx. 1 Tweet every 2.5 days).

He’s what I would call more of a “I’ve gotta launch” tweeters than someone who stops to genuinely interact.

So, Brad votes for his friend in the Shorty Awards and tweets about it. 11 hours later he comes back to tell everyone he is “crankin’ up energy on Twitter as I engage some awesome new Twitter strategies. Only ONE catch, it requires “listening”"

Funny – Brad doesn’t seem interested in listening himself.

He has 7261 followers and follows 6749 people. He can’t possibly be listening to any one of those people unless they send a Tweet directly to him.

But look! He makes it quite clear he does not have to be one of those listeners. That only applies to the rest of the Twitter population (the ones who buy his shit)

And as well as sending 13 (of his 262) tweets in just 1 hour, he starts telling US how to use Twitter.

Apparently it’s all about listening (us not him) and then us all clicking on his link that automates a message to our own updates saying “@shortyawards I vote for @dhollings in the Shorty Awards Finals for #socialmedia because… he offers great Twitter Tips” (good news is that the intelligent among us at this point don’t actually click our update buttons).

Talk about burning long term relationships for a quickie on the side! (though that could be his strategy, he doesn’t use his account and now people are all talking about how crazy he is, and he sees it as a worthwhile sacrifice)

Brad, Twitter is about relationships. Give and take. Don’t Twitter only when you want something from us. Listening goes both ways. You may be a “guru” but I can turn you off with the click of the mouse.

Oh…and look….I did!

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It pays for Internet marketers to be up to date with what is going down around them and not just focussing on self promotion. That means reading the latest blogs, keeping up with who’s product is who and generally being present.

Which is why Lynn Terry is apparently fishing a stiletto from her tonsils after this Twitter post

“If you’re using WordPress Direct, now would be a good time to quit. http://bit.ly/uMn5″

Far be it from me to call Lynn slow, but HELLO, that blog post was two months ago and was addressed in the comments by her Internet Marketing This Week partner Ed Dale.

What was the point of Lynn making this point I wonder? Especially when she was a guest of Ed Dale at Over The Edge 2 and would have sat through a presentation by the founder and marketer of WordPress Direct, Marty Rozmanith.

I know if I was partnered with Mizz Terry at this stage I would have a face like I just sucked lemon.

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That John Carlton is sending a message to Andy Jenkins in his post today The Reason You Screwed Up . Totally makes sense to me,

Film editors…

You screw up… you disembowel the entire gig.

And your fabulous excuse doesn’t fix anything.

No one wants to hear it.

Wonder how much that screw up with Stompernet really cost….

p.s. hahah I screwed up myself…apologies RSS feeders!

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Buy me!

Question: Have you seen the new PPC Spy thing being bandied about? For fun go sign up with a gmail account or something just to get to the second video. Now ask yourself one simple question – are you stupid enough to sign up for the platinum product.

The premise this product is being sold on is fatally FLAWED and the flaw is so easy to spot. Yet I bet a gazillion greedy people out there will go “hey I’m leaving my brain in my wallet and pulling out my credit card”.

Who is the ONLY market that will buy the Platinum upgrade? Idiot wannabes

How many idiot wannabes will upgrade? Lets be generous and say 5000

That is a market of only 5000 you are hoping to have purchase through one of your affiliate links. WTF!!!

What are those idiot wannabes going to buy from your links? NOTHING! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOTHING!!! They will buy from their own freaking affiliate links if they are buying something.

If I was going to market this product I would have sold the basic package for $97 and had the affiliate link revenue go to a charity of my choice (the few cents it will make). That at least means idiot wannabes are doing something useful other than being mindless cud chewing bovines.

Also…why is Mike Filsaime promoting this product. One would hope you do not end up on one of his “suck the newbies dry” mailing lists. I bet he is laughing his ass off right about now

So if you are reading this, that means you are one of the first to understand the power of this and take action with it it to make money. Join me in using this great software and make sure to upgrade. It would be silly to not upgrade now. Just plain silly.”

Mike Filsaime
MarketingDotCom.com

Silly? Yeah i wouldn’t be able to write a decent testimonial either if I was laughing as hard as Mike probably is.

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Look out around the traps for the new Mike Filsaime product. It won’t be hard to find. All the “inner circle” dudes will be helping their “buddy” out by spruiking it up. And I will probably rant about the whole offer later because it totally makes me laugh is so incongruent.

But tell me, what freaking market is he going for using this kind of graphic? Rainbows, pink, a well groomed man (who is probably obsessively neat). Not that there is anything wrong with that. Just sayin’

Rating: Alternative lifestyle? Mike can has it

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Interesting that on further research into the Wayne Mansfield name that was compared to Ed Dale we come up with a Wikipedia entry that just BOGGLES the mind with the description of the heinous activities that Wayne Mansfield apparently got up to.

Extract:

Wayne Mansfield, of Perth in Western Australia, was the head of direct marketing business T3 Direct Marketing, operating under a series of two-dollar companies, and in 2005 became the first Australian to be prosecuted for email spamming.

…..

ACMA’s complaint in this matter was upheld^[5] in the Australia Federal Court on 13 April 2006. The Court imposed a penalty of AU$4.5 million on Clarity1, and AU$1 million on Wayne Mansfield, on 27 October 2006^[5].

If that was me I would have changed my name AND left the country.

And Ed Dale would have been uber pissed to be compared to the kind of scum he truly detests.

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Yep the following leaked email proved what I thought

—————————————————————-

Subject: Don Fleece Update

The Don Fleece prank was a massive success. For the first time since 1983 or something, John Reese was away from his computer for like 10 straight hours while he was out Christmas shopping. (Probably buying really nice stuff for me.)

And that just happened to be the time when we launched Operation Winter Storm.

Anyway – HOLY SHIT!

Apparently some people actually thought Don Fleece was *real* and called John’s office. One person even asked if they should return Traffic Secrets because they heard John ripped off some other guy,

There were apparently two threads on the Warrior Forum for a while.

I think two or three people there thought this was a marketing ploy to re-launch Traffic Secrets or something …or perhaps those posts were just made by team members.  Hard to tell.

Ol’ Johnny was flipping out for about 30 minutes or so until I fessed up. Then we (naturally) had a laugh. Or 50.

What really amazes me is how big this got and how fast it all grew.

We were only “live” for about 10 hours and in that time it seems like lots of people were hearing about this new Don Fleece guy.

That was a surprise to me. I figured we’d just get John’s attention and have a little joke on him.

I’m amazed at how fast the Traffic Secrets buzz left our little group and went “main stream”.

And this brings me to a point I hate to admit:

ED DALE TOLD ME SO.

God I want to vomit from saying that.

A few years ago told me this whole social media thing was gonna be huge. I scoffed.

Crow never tasted so good.

Anyway – we have an official TRUCE with John.

And the rule is that whoever gets Punked last gets to pick the next …umm …well …victim.

So we’ll see who (Eben) John picks (Eben).

There’s someone (Eben) I’d nominate but it’s ultimately up to John.

Eben.

Talk soon,

Frank
——————–

Now for those watching at home remember the following facts

Ed Dale is in the middle of the 30DC+ launch thingo, and so is Eben Pagan in the middle of  a launch.

Get those names into the psyche of your followers Frank, pump up the jam… doesn’t do for them to be too fixated on just your products when you have the “buddies” to help out.

Rating:  So subtle it’s like soft satin..slides over your mind and leaves you purring

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To some  non- IMers the long sales letter = Nigerian scam. That is how self-styled  social media specialist Stephen Collins fell into a bit of a hole when he accused Ed Dale of being associated with some form of flim-flammery after spotting the sales letters for Dominiche (web site selling course) and the Thirty Day Challenge.

Now it is my belief the days of the sales letter as we know it are numbered. The functional illiteracy that is sweeping the interwebs will put paid to that. If you aren’t able to explain in 3 lines or a 90 second video then you have NO hope at all making sales to this and the next generation.

True, they (sales letters) are around, and those unfamiliar with them can will make some erroneous assumptions ( luck of the draw unless you are in the biz, knowing who is full of shit and who is good).

So it is light sabers drawn at 20 paces tomorrow when both men meet to discuss their various view points. My bet is that Ed will win some, but not all of the argument. Purists really dislike the conversation being sullied with any form of commerce. The irony is, they make money from being experts in that they don’t like to see monetized. Que sera.

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I have been having a good chuckle to myself watching the “shenanigans” going on in Frank Kern’s world.  In particular I enjoyed watching the mass movement of a great deal of his followers to perform various deeds to play a “prank” on John Reese.

The “prank” seemed to fall flat because whatever was going on behind closed doors was hidden to those taking part. If John Reese really did think something was going down, a video or recorded phone call would have been some nice proof that the ends justified the mean(s).

Prank my right…arm… Sif Frank wasn’t testing something, or proving something, or at the very WORST flexing his power over a large group of people to see how far he could direct them.

Still, watch out kiddies. If Franks starts asking you to wear black Nikes and shave your head, you might want to consider for a nanosecond why you are being so suggestible.

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Or so some of the hysteria on twitter would have you believe.

Long story short (and jeez does Chris make short stories LONG) Chris Brogan is an advisory member on some board for pay-for-post mob Izea . Izea want to run a campaign for K-Mart to get bloggers blogging about the K-Mart shopping experience, so they hook up Chris as one of the guinea pigs.

Chris does the business and also hands over the ill gotten booty to Toys for Tots, all thoroughly disclosed on his blog. One would think and open-and-shut piece of marketing.

But NO!

Because Chris writes such long blog posts with such big words, the Twitterscreamers are left floundering at line 3 and make up their own minds. Chris brogan is a pay-for-poster, the lowest of the low.

Dear oh dear!

I see that we need to include a new version of blog accessiblilty that has been round in the scientific and business worlds for a long time. The ‘abstract”.  If you have readers who cannot read more than two paragraphs you must include this to save your integrity online.

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We can do this one of two ways. You can buy my ad space because you WANT to be featured here, or because you don’t want to be here.

Some might not WANT to be associated to a wildly successful, but maybe not of your taste, kind of site. That is fine! You can PAY me the monthly amount not to put one of your affiliate links here. I will instead put up an ad for Kiva or similar.

The smart people will WANT to PAY to be on this site.

The really smart people will want to get in early and negotiate a long term deal before things get really hectic and I have to charge a gazillion dollars more for the privilidge of the site carrying your brand.

Click HERE to contact me for my reasonable rates

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Enjoy a bit of fun about our time of most stress…the LAUNCH!

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Miracles do happen! This past couple of weeks a high profile continuity site with a loyal following, finally got their shit together and paid out affiliate commissions (some of which went back 18 MONTHS).

Sources tell me there were some very happy people who had kept quiet while waiting for their payments.

Luckily all the grumbling about this issue was kept behind closed doors.  Doesn’t do to let it leak out you don’t pay your rainmakers.

Rating:  Paid up! i.e. no imaginary Christmas

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Some weird stuff happens in the IM world, usually caused by some weird people. So when a week or so ago I came across the story of the business relationship that had gone bad and ended up with claims of paedophillia I was not so surprised.

After reading the long rambling blog post that could have been written by the unabomber himself I came to a startling realization. If  people like this are making money on the internet, imagine how much you can make if you are actually SANE!

Rating: amazingly bad taste – even from IM

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There is so much that happens in the IM world that just does not get written about. Mostly because people are scared that if they do it is going to cost them money.

Thing is this shit is too good to just let disappear.

I will be blatantly upfront about this blog is here to make me money. I want people to buy my ad space, choose my links over others. Why? because I will be supplying entertainment, gossip, scandal and whatever else I can get my hands on to make life fun while we do these things and humans being the imperfect creatures they are will flock here to see what is new in the zoo.

Also being upfront I am going to tell you that this blog will be totally anonymous. There may be one author, there may be more than one. They may be male or female. young or old, cat or dog….

Feel free to get as controversial as you like in comments, like I said, this whole place is meant for fun and traffic.

Look at this as the Perez Hilton of the IM world, but also realize this is written in a very tongue-in-cheek satirical way, and is ion no way meant to be taken seriously.

Oh and I reserve the right to change the names of people to protect the innocent…if I so wish.

To make me and you feel a little better about what I am doing here, I am going to donate a 10% gross amount of all earnings to Kiva.

So on with the show!

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